My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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