my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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