Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
My life is pants optional.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
