We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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