That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
wat bout pragnant strippers??
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
