handjob tips. give me some.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize