Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
