I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I believe in your delicious
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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