Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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