this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
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