I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize