Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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