spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize