This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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