But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
