Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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