May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
