u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Randomize
