Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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