Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize