tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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