after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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