I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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