Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
