i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Randomize