Nicole vs. Life
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
