I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
