bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
