i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
You're like the curious george of whores
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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