Whod you bang
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
