Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
what is it with giant penises always finding me
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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