so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
