I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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