that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize
