but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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