He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize