Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
Randomize
