Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
