well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
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