I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
