Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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