my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
