all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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