I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
