was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
