we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
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