is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
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