im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
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