You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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