no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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