how do flat chested girls get laid?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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